i am watching eddie izzard and realized that his accent makes everything five times funnier. another though, i find him really sexy. maybe it is because i saw him as charlie chaplin first or maybe i am crazy and have a thing for guys who dress in drag.
after once again having a uneventful date, i wish that i could meet someone who i actually clicked with so that i could stop having to think about all this. i don't think i want to much, yet i do have a very clear idea of what it needs to incorperate. reading 'intimate allies' has both been comforting and frustrating. i know why i have wanted a certain kind of relationship, i was created for it. we were all created for a beautiful and mixed up relationship that reveal God's glory though it.
so i find my self asking God how long, and yet also submitting to his best for me. that best is a relationship that mirrors his relationship to us and also one that is challenging. i want to be challenged and grown this is why i cannot just be with anyone, or have a relationship just to have one. i guess right now i am just called to grow and wait.