Sunday, October 30, 2011

back again to the days of tremors

it breaks my heart to watch you suffer...not because of the twitches and the stuttering and the effects of this awful disease, but because of the emotional ravaging that comes. the post tremor fears and the deep held thoughts that seep out in you partial state. your strength and tenacity shine through as well as your humor. in the midst of an episode i say something stupid to make you laugh you come back with "i'd laugh if you would say something funny" which in turn leads to that much needed release. i hate and cherish these moments with you, hating the fact that you are experiencing them yet cherishing the beauty and grace in which you move through them.

disease and trauma, laughter and love these are the elements in which we construct each day. walking in valleys ripely filled with landmines and hand grenades ready to explode the call is to walk the path in trust of the ones who have gone before. i am constantly afraid of tripping the wires that lead to death where as you stride confidant in the way being made and the subtle adjustments to have as we go. my heart is filled with love for those i love in joy and suffering i ask for their restoration and life. 

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