i feel caught in a constant tug-o-war. life plunges on as my heart races circles with it's self. singleness and coupledom battle in my head as interest peaks, dates are scheduled, and an old lover comes around. the reckless part of me seeks chaos and conflict, she throws landmines building brick walls faster than you can say "how do you do." fear and love are clawing at each other, my head spins with all the various directional pulls. i curse my depth and introspection wishing to be someone who doesn't over think everything.